Webmastering Biker

I apologise, this diverges from the remit of what I intended to write on this blog...

I met Paul a several months ago at a party and over what could only be a few hours I instantly liked him. he had a sense of humour that I really understood and thought at the time how unlike a soldier he was, not in looks as it was evident that he was a man who was physically very fit (and someone whom you wouldn't want the mistake of starting a fight with), but in the easy going, confident but not over-bearing personality. I realise now that I had a stereotypical prejudice of a soldier and what I expected a soldier to be, Paul was not and cured me of that natural assumption.

I remember then, that I had some trepidation when I learnt that he was due to go on a tour in Iraq, and I remember also my rationale of "accepted risk and a soldiers lot" that I convinced myself at the time. I also remember glancing through the paper and skim reading the Independant this morning and recall the all too regular short paragraph about the "152nd British casualty" of Iraq. I didn't read further and even if I did it wouldn't have registered. It was a shock then that shortly after I got into work my fiance called and said that her friends husband Paul was that person. It was a shock and surprise at how badly I am taking this and a reflection of the impression that Paul had on me in such a short time. It is doubly hard to empathise with the grief with Paul's family whom I met and bonded with at that very same party. It seems very hollow to wish condolensces and prayers at this time, but my thoughts go to them nonetheless.

I am aware of the hyprocisy of the situation. I have read many such headlines over the years and every family that this awful tragedy has gone through has had to endure unimaginable fear for loved ones serving and equally unimaginable grief at news of such tragedy. I have always sympathised when such news appears on the TV but other than a disassociated political anger I have never been moved to do anything about it. Hell, what could I do about it? It is our selfish nature I think that only when personaly affected does anything hit us at all. And though I think that generaly, I attribute that mostly to myself as well. All I can say is that the strong feeling of grief that I have for Paul's loss will affect me deeply, and the same thoughts that go to his family will go to all those who have suffered the same and unfortunately will do so in the future.

To put this into context read the BBC Story of Major Paul Harding and the tributes to his character at http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/6227978.stm .